dating and singlehood

valentine’s series 3: atarction

Ok, so this is actually about atTRAction, but my typo made me lol so i’m keeping it. I’m fairly sure atarction is some kind of economic situation related to excessive amounts of Atari cartidges in one’s house, but this blog is not about that. Because I’m no economist.

I don’t think anyone has really adequately explained what attracts people to each other. There are so many factors to consider from the basics like hairstyle, clothing, current lighting of the room, to the more advanced criteria of the type of beer he’s currently holding (preferably with fruit in it), is he staring at your cleavage, does he have shiny teeth, etc. What makes us pick out a certain person in a crowd of people and think, I wonder if I can talk him into backpacking across the Great Wall of China for our honeymoon?

“Hi, my name is Robin. Nice to meet you. How do you feel about backpacking and sticky rice?”

Initially, as human beings, we are drawn by attraction, like the proverbial moth to a flame, like metal to magnets, like well anything to the Death Star’s tractor beam. You can try to analyze it and categorize, like how I’ve dated more men than I care to admit who have told me they have a “thing” for asians. (To which I reply, what “thing” would that be? A large sum of money? A semi automatic weapon? A key fob?) This “thing” can be written off to stereotypical prejudices certain people have carried around regarding females of asian appearance (no i’m not a masseuse) OR there could be some mysterious yet legitimate yet unproven yet undeniable biochemical reaction that tells a person’s brain, hey, this person is a real looker.

So while to some degree, we want others to view us for the person we are “inside” and all, there is no denying that certain je ne sais quoi that some people have to lure us in. What I am more interested in is how long he can keep a conversation going, does he get my subtle sarcasm, and does he make me laugh, not my polite wow-i-cant-believe-he-thought-that-was-funny laugh, but a real actual LOL. I mean, looks don’t escape me. I have dated some very handsome men in my day. Of all types and shades and sizes and stuff (and even in that more factors get mixed into the complexity of attraction).

It isn’t that I reject looks as a general rule, but I’ve come to find that the hotter they are the less likely we will work out. I’m sure there’s a sociological study to be done there, but I sure won’t waste my time. I have Dexter episodes to catch up on. Upon further reflection, I think you could say that I tend to like kinda goofy guys with a slight tinge of psychopath… moths to a flame, man, moths to a flame…


6 thoughts on “valentine’s series 3: atarction

  1. 1. You know this: if he’s a man, he’ll look at your cleavage. Maybe not in an obvious fashion, but he’ll look. Do you need a Marty Feldman eye popping out stare to make it happen? (I really wanted to insert this picture:
    2. Beer that has fruit in it IS NOT BEER! It’s some hoppy, fruity drink for drinking on a beach or, if it has chocolate in it, for drinking on the slopes, but it’s not a beer. It’s an abortion*.

    *Something malformed or incompletely developed; a monstrosity.

  2. Yeah, that whole attraction thing has gotten me. I’ve slowed my roll way the heck down so I can get a better idea of who someone is before there’s any chance we hit the ole sackaroony. This has been working WAY better for me.

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