dating and singlehood

valentine’s series 6: my husband

ok, so i don’t have one of them suckers. But I saw this survey on a friend’s blog and I had to rewrite it because I crack myself up.


Here’s a chance to see how well you really know your husband. Cut, paste and fill in the answers, then forward . . . shoot, you know what to do. The real challenge is to send it to your husband to see how right you really are.

1. He’s sitting in front of the TV, what is on the screen?
a bunch of zeros and ones, because the image translators work for the construct

2. You’re out to eat; what kind of dressing does he get on his salad?
are you kidding? if we’re OUT to eat, we’re having pure crap. we can get rabbit food at home.

3. What’s one food he doesn’t like?
anything not asian

4. You go out to eat and have a drink. What does he order?
water. because he’s driving my drunk butt home.

5. Where did he go to high school?
he just graduated from san dimas high school football rules!

6. What size shoe does he wear?
his tevas are big. that’s all i know.

7. If he was to collect anything, what would it be?
my tears, every time he touches my heart

8. What is his favorite type of sandwich?
whatever type of sammich i make him!

9. What would he eat every day if he could?
i really cant answer this in a suitable fashion

10. What is his favorite cereal?
the kind you put milk in 

11. What would he never wear?
an I heart Jesus t-shirt
or conversely, a tee with an ichthys that turned into a newt looking thing with the name Darwin in it.

12. What is his favorite sports team?
i would settle for a non-sports enthusiast. esp if he has anything against the STEELERS.

13. Who did he vote for?
yo mama

14. Who is his best friend?
incidentally, yo mama

15. What is something you do that he wishes you wouldn’t do?
answer surveys

16. What is his heritage?
he comes from a long line of mountain folk who claim to have invented smoke and smoke related products.

17. You bake him a cake for his birthday; what kind of cake?
tofu. with bacon icing.

18. Did he play sports in high school?
san dimas high school football, duh!

19. What could he spend hours doing?
writing me love poems and translating into 30 different languages. then he’ll paint a larger than life portrait of me (ten lbs lighter of course) glowing in the sunlight on the side of our house while his fully orchestrated score called “ode to the most beautiful amazingly brilliant woman in the world” plays sweetly in the background. and then he’ll make a roaring fire and kiss me passionately enveloping me in his strong (but soft) arms.

then when i get over my nausea, we’ll go out to dinner and not order a salad.

20. What is one unique talent he has?
putting up with my sarcasm and lack of true feelings.

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