So in any new job there is a bit of a learning curve. I know this. And I have gone into new industries and new environments many times before. That said, I feel like this one has been my most challenging yet. For so many reasons – engineering jargon being one of the more predominant ones. I just feel like things take me twice as long to do because I am not sure of myself and then I feel guilty that it took so long and then I get insecure and feel less sure of myself when I inevitably mess something up the first time. I am not one to tuck my tail and whimper, but at times I’ve felt like knocking my head, ever so gently mind you, against a concrete wall. As long as the concrete is not cracking due to drainage issues or lack of steel reinforcement bars. Hey now that I’m at a structural engineering firm, I have to think of these things.
I have to admit that there is a certain amount of enjoyment in some of the things I’m doing. Stuff I’ve always wanted to do but just never had a job that called for it really, or there was someone else doing it and I would have been stepping on toes. I wouldn’t have taken the job if I felt that most of my interests and skills wouldn’t be used and I think that both bosses knew this and are letting me do some fun stuff too. Life can’t all be fun though and I am super fine with having a job that’s challenging and takes me out of my comfort zone a bit. I can’t know EVERYthing and be brilliant all the time. Once a year is about my quota.
Meanwhile, some other things in my life have taken a backseat for now until I get into a better groove. Like taking that blasted eHarmony quiz… I’d rather answer questions about EIFS and rebar. Ok not really. But that personality profile test is scary yo. or maybe it’s just my fear of having yet another place to be rejected. le sigh.
-insert sorry for myself emoticon here-