Tension is useful. It gives us things like sailing and skiing and lava lamps and rock climbing and floating in a pool. Obviously I’m talking physics – which I barely passed in high school due mostly (at least this is my story and I’m sticking to it) to an unintelligible teacher from like Yugoslavia or something who smelled bad and giggled at his lame jokes. But from what I’ve been told, tension is useful.
My family dynamic growing up was a solid one, owing mostly to my mom’s overworked sense of unity. well maybe overworked is actually inaccurate as you can’t really be TOO committed to unity. She made us do things together or we didn’t do it at all. We ate together, went to the store together (I feel like I spent way too much time in the boys’ shoes department) and had family meetings where we talked about our problems and planned vacations. In retrospect, my mom was awesome. Currently, my mom is awesome.
So we just stay together. I would consider each of my family members my best friends, my dad, my mom, my two brothers. They are my go to peeps when I need to talk out something. They are the first to help. They are the ones that cry with me, laugh with me and support me. I would be completely lost without them.
Today my parents celebrate their 48th anniversary and while their marriage is not perfect by any stretch, I have had the extreme privilege of watching them grow together and raise a family who for all accounts is pretty tight. No small feat. My mom still stands by the door until my dad opens it, and waits by her chair until he pulls it out for her. They still talk about everything. They still make important decisions together. We still celebrate events on the day or as close to it as possible as a family, and when we can’t be together, we call. My parents have been my example of unity with tension – like that thing you do when you sit back to back and lean on each other to hold each other up. When one leans too far the other gets cramped and uncomfortable. You are constantly looking to achieve that perfect balance, compromising when necessary, fighting when necessary (and it is sometimes) and at the end of the day, never going to sleep angry with unaired grievances, and always kissing good night. Well I’m guessing on that. At least they have that plaque hanging in their room.
Dad & Mom!
God’s richest blessings
on both your heads!